Monday, 2 July 2007

The 80's Asshole

So I was hanging out with my friend Raph yesterday and we got talking about Blond 80's Asshole, aka William Zabka - who was notabely the asshole from Cobra Cai but was also an asshole in Back to School staring Rodney Dangerfield and some dude no one has ever heard of since and remember Just one of the Guys? In that classic, his asshole speciality is lifting the lunch tables so that all the trays of food fall on the geeks sitting at the end of the bench. Take it, geeks.

check out the "Manpix" on the left, is it me or does he look a little too much like Princess Diana? (despite the cock buldge.) Anyway, I casually mentioned to Raph that I had a crush on Blond Asshole at some point in my adolescance and he freaked out kind of like when Peter freaks out at Jennifer Aniston in Office Space when he thinks she slept with his boss Lumberg. I admitted that the bigger crush was on Ralph Matchio (still to this day) and this calmed him.

Karate Kid is still in my top 10 favorite movies, it combines all of my favorite things...martial arts, montage, a championship of some kind, training, 80's music and of course Blond Asshole. Now movie assholes are all terrorists. Snore! I say bring back the 80's asshole, he needs to work again.

your fan,

I Make Myself Cringe

I just stood behind Stephen Merchant at Waitrose. He turned and looked at me and I wanted to say something like "I'm a big fan" without sounding like a tosser but couldn't and instead opted for the gurgling sound that left my throat which, if that wasn't bad enough, I followed with a limp "hey."

Naturally he said nothing in return and judging from the fact that I was buying Flora spread, ryvita and 2 kiwis, I really don't blame him.